Phoebe Buffay Zenebüfé
1/1
A Few of My Favorite Things
Raindrops on roses
and rabbits and kittens
Bluebells and sleighbells
and something with mittens
la la la la la la something and noodles with string
These are a few...
1/1
Love
Love is sweet as summer showers
Love is a wondrous work of art
But your love oh your love, your love
Is like a giant pigeon
Crapping on my heart.
La-la-la-la-la- La-la-la-la...
1/7
Blackout
New York City has no power
And the milk is getting sour
But to me that is not scary
Cause I stay away from dairy
La-la-la-la-la-la...
1/10
Cremated Mother
My mother s ashes,
even her eyelashes
Are resting in a little yellow jar
And sometimes when it s breezy
Or when I m feeling sneezy
And now I...
1/10
Snowman
I made a man with eyes of coal
And a smile so bewitchin ,
How was I supposed to know
That my mom was dead in the kitchen?
La lalala la la la la lalala la la...
1/11
My Coma Guy
You don t have to be awake to be my man
As long as you have brain waves I ll be there to hold your hand.
Though we just met the other day
There s something I have go to say...
1/23
Babies
They re tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch
Soon they ll grow up and resent you so much
Now they re yelling at you and you don t know why
And you cry and you cry and you cry
And you cry and you cry...
1/23
They Found Their Bodies
And they found their bodies the very next day
They found their bodies the very next day...
2/6
Double-Jointed Boy
He was a double, double, double-jointed boy
2/6
When I Play
When I play, I play for me
I don t need your charity.
La la la la la la la....
2/6
In The Shower
I m in the shower and I m writing a song.
Stop me if you ve heard it.
My skin is soapy, and my hair is wet,
And Tegrin spelled backward is Nirget.
2/6 2/17 3/14 4/5 4/18
Smelly Cat
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat, it s not your fault.
They won t take you to the vet.
You re obviously not their favorite pet.
It may not be a bed of roses.
And you re no friend to those with noses.
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat, it s not your fault.
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat, it s not your fault.
2/6
Stephanie
Stephanie,
Knows all the Cords...
2/6
Terry Is A Jerk
Terry s a jerk
And he won t let me work
And I hate Central Perk!
2/8
Two of Them Kissed Last Night
There was a girl we ll call her Betty
And a guy let s call him Neil
Now I can t stress this point too strongly
This story isn t real.
(time passes by)
Now our Neil must decide
Who will be the girl that he casts aside?
Will Betty be the one who he loves truly
Or will it be the one who we ll call L-L-Lulie?
He must decide, he must decide
Even though I made him up he must decide
2/12
Barnyard Animals
Oh the cow in the meadow goes "moo"
Oh the cow in the meadow goes "moo"
Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up
And that s how we get hamburgers.
Noooowwwww chickens!
2/12
Don t
There ll be times when you get older
And you ll want to sleep with people
Just to make them like you
But DON T
Cause that s another thing that you don t wanna do
That s another thing that you don t wanna do
2/12
Bi-sexuals
Sometimes men love women
And sometimes men love men
Then there are bi-sexuals
Though some just say they re kidding themselves
La-la-la-la-la-la...
2/12
Grandma
Now grandma s a person who everyone likes
She brought you a train and a bright shiny bike
But lately she hasn t been coming to dinner
And last time you saw her she looked so much thinner.
Now your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru,
But the truth is she died and someday you will too
La-la-la-la-la...
2/18
Crusty Old Man
...And the crusty old man said "I ll do what I can"
And the rest of the rats played maracas
3/8
Endless Love (Duet with Chandler)
(Chandler) I’ll hold you close in my aaarms.
I can’t resist your charm. And loooove....
(Phoebe joins in) Looooove...
I’ll be a foool for youuuu. I’m sure, you know I don’t mind.
(Chandler) No you know I don’t mind.
(Chandler & Phoebe) And yes! You mean the world the world to meeee. Oooh...
(Chandler) I know.
(Phoebe) I know.
(Chandler) I’ve found.
(Phoebe) I ve found...
(Chandler & Phoebe) in youuuu, my endless looov...
My endless looove....
looove....
love....
(Chandler) looove
(Phoebe) love
(Chandler) looove....
3/14
Jingle B*tch
Jingle b*tch screwed me over!
Go to hell jingle whore!
Go to hell Go to hell.
Go to hell-hell-hell.
3/14
Sticky Shoes
Leslie: My best shoes, so good to me.
I wear them everyday.
Down at the heel, holes in the toes.
Don’t care what people say.
My feet’s best friends, pals to the end.
With them I’m one hot chicky.
Though late one night, not much light, I....
Phoebe: I stepped in something icky.
Phoebe and Leslie: Sticky shoes, sticky shoes,
always make me smile.
Sticky shoes, sticky shoes,
next time I’ll.... avoid the..... pillleeeee.
3/23
Crazy Underwear
Crazy underwear creeping up my butt
Crazy underwear always in a rut
Crazy underwear...
4/1
The 66 Colors of my Bedroom
...fuschia and mauve
Those are the 66 colors of my bedroom
4/2
Dumb Drunken B*tch
...dumb drunken b*tch!!
4/5
Parading Goats
Parading goats are parading,
Parading down the street.
Parading goats are parading,
Leaving little treats.
4/5
Paper Maché
And I m still waiting for my paper mache man
4/5
Sticky Shoes
My sticky shoes, my sticky-sticky shoes,
Why do you stick on me, ba-a-by!
4/7
Tiny Tarzan
Little, tiny Tarzan, swinging on a nose hair.
Swinging with the greatest of ease…
4/10
Holiday Song
Went to the store, sat on Santa s lap
Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap
Said all you need is to write them a song
Now you haven t heard it yet so don t try to sing along
No don t sing along
Monica, Monica, have a happy Hanukkah
Saw Santa Claus, he said hello to Ross
And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowwwwwy
And Rachel and Chandler, (mumbles something) handler!
4/12
Little Fetus
Are you in there little fetus?
In nine months will you come greet us?
I will buy you some Adidas
6/3
Little Black Curly Hair
I found you in my bed...
How d you wind up there?
You are a mystery
Little black curly hair
Little black curly hair
Little black, little black,
Little black, little black,
Little black curly hair
6/16
Two Heart Attacks
It only takes two heart attacks
to finally make you see
one of them won t do it
but the second will set you free
Tell all your hate and anger
it s time to say good bye
and that is just what I will do
as soon as those bastards I work for die
Lalalalalalalalalala...
7/1
12 Years Old And Addicted to Pork
Twelve years old and addicted to pork,
No one thought Monica would marry.
She knew her way around a knife and a fork...
7/1
First Time I Met Chandler
First time I met chandler
I thought he was gay
but here I am singing
on his wedding daaaay
7/1
Whenever I Get Married
Whenever I get married
Guess who I won t ask to sing!
Somebody named Geller! And somebody else named Bing!!!
7/1
Who s Gonna Perform the Ceremony
Who will perform the ceremony!
Who will perform the cer...
7/1
Thought Phoebe Would Leave
We thought Phoebe would leave, but she just stayed and stayed.
That’s right, I’m here all night, and Chandler will never get l…
9/19
Argentina Song
And there’s a country called Argentina
It’s a place I’ve never seen
But I m told for fifty pesos
You can buy a human spleeeeen
Human spleen!
Olé!
9/19
The Woman Smelled Like Garbage
It wasn’t just that she was fat,
The woman smelled like garbage!
Everyone!
It wasn’t just that she was fat,
The woman smelled like gaaaarbage!
Classy huh?
9/19
The Food Here At Javu
The food here at Javu...will kill you!
The food here at Javu...will kill you!
(Monica) Oh thank God, I thought someone was swinging a bag of cats against the wall.
(Phoebe) You d better get back in that kitchen Monica, the garlic s not going to overuse itself.
10/4
Emma
Emma!
Your name poses a dilemma.
Cause not much else rhymes with Emma!
Maybe the actor Richard Crenna,
He played the commanding officer in Rambo.
Happy birthday Emma!
10/20
Sun Comes Up
Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming!
And the moon comes...
10/20
Don t Take No For An Answer
Bam-bam, don t take no for an answer.
Bam-bam, don t let love fly away.
Bam-bam-bam-bam..
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